Sam and Kachi waffle back and forth on whether or not they want a note in their lunch. Sam looked forward to his notes all through kindergarten, but somewhere along the way, someone told Sam that only babies like notes in their lunch, so from then on, he has steadily refused any offers. Kachi, hearing that, decided he didn't want notes for about a month this year ... but changed his mind and now expects one with a doodle as well (in colour, if you please). Vava, on the other hand, has always wanted a note, at least one, and two are even better.
This morning I ran out of time to put a note in Vava's lunchbox.
"Miss V," I shook my head as I wrestled an unwilling Kachi into snowpants (why don't they ever believe me when I say it's cold outside?), "You'll have to zip up your lunchbox and put it in your backpack without a note. I'm sorry." I steeled myself for a storm. Instead, she just smiled.
"It's okay. I'm wearing my necklace." Yes! Her friend made her a necklace with a note inside - how perfect! She continued, "It says I love you Vava, and I will read it and remember I am loved and that I am Vava."
My precious girl. I hadn't realized what that meant.
At school, Vivian is a relentlessly high achiever. She holds her breath, dives in, does everything as perfectly as she can and comes home half-strangled and emptied, where Vava can breathe.
Vava is loved just as she is, no performance or achievement required, and falls apart whenever she needs to. (Vivian, you may be sure, has never fallen apart.)
It isn't a fresh, colourful note that she needs to take with her each day - it's the reminder that she's her truest version of herself, and she's loved.
And that's what the Christmas bells ring out - you are loved! just as you are!
That's why God sent Jesus.
He didn't gussy us up first.
He didn't give us a list of planetary or personal improvements to make before that star-soaked night in Bethlehem.
He sent Him to us, just as we are, because He loves us so.
And it's not a note in the lunchbox, but at Christmas time it's a love note to the whole world.
You are you, and you are loved.
Merry Christmas, friends.
xo.
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