A New Feast

What do you usually eat for Christmas?

Growing up, we usually had the traditional midday dinner of turkey, potatoes (sometimes scallion champ, if we were lucky), stuffing, veggies, and gravy. Dessert was more flexible (perhaps a glorious pavlova topped with canned mandarin slices?), and there was almost always a tin of Quality Street and a bag of chicken bones that hit the table when the games came out. (Nova Scotians, please stop hoarding all the chicken bones. I can't buy them here and it hurts.)  When night fell, a snacky serve-yourself supper would appear  (I say appear because I was a kid, and didn't have to do any of the work!) - the turkey, again, and assorted cheese and crackers (bacon dippers and swiss cheese crackers were my faves), Clementines and a big bowl of nuts in shells, topped with a few nutcrackers (which did double duty in summertime as lobster shell crackers). There might be a box of Pot of Golds, a tray of Toffifee, a bag of saltwater taffy and definitely a giant tin of popcorn in three flavours (butter, cheddar, and caramel) and of course, there would be Liquorice Allsorts and After Eights.

(Apparently I can't write a nostalgic post about food without a million asides, but here's one more - is the giant popcorn tin an east coast thing, or a long-ago thing? Either way, I can't find them here - people keep directing me to Kernels, which isn't at all the same thing. I'm so curious.)

And mashed inextricably in with memories of the food of Christmases past are memories of all the people who were there. Aunts and uncles, cousins and friends, games and stories and laughter and singing.

As a parent, of course, Christmas dinner is an entirely different kettle of fish. Making a meal, hosting festivities, repeating traditions that evoke memories - the weight lies differently. If nobody wants to cook a turkey, does the holiday sparkle a little less? I mean - is it the actual menu that makes Christmas magic? 

I think no. I think - I think that traditions are great until they become constraints.

When Jesus came, he upended empty traditions. He criticized people for keeping outward traditions that missed the heart of the scriptures. Praying in public, but no inner communing with God. Tithing obsessively, but ignoring the poor. Giving to God, and ignoring family members in need. Traditions that don't serve us aren't of any value.

A friend of mine was so disappointed last year. She worked herself to the point of exhaustion preparing a traditional Christmas feast all by herself, and her family ate it but they weren't excited about it. "It's not the same without everyone here," her son said. "This is company food." And of course, with covid restrictions in place, they didn't have a big family gathering. 

And they're keeping it small again this year, so she asked everyone in her household for one suggestion. They each had to tell her one food that makes them feel happy and celebrate-y. Her husband asked for chicken wings, her daughter asked for nuggets, her son asked for soft pretzels, and my friend wanted cranberry sauce. So their Christmas dinner is centering around those things this year, and she was surprised by how much joy it was giving her to plan a feast specifically for the people who would be there, even though it wasn't the feast they'd usually enjoy. 

As a mom, my favourite Christmas dinner ever was the year we ate grilled cheese with a side of storebought stuffing. We ate by candlelight and there were no complaints, nothing left on the side of plates, no sad kids. No high expectations and disappointments, no kitchen full of dishes to wash, no leftovers for days. It was just genuinely happy and good. This year we're having chicken pot pie. We might still have a side of stuffing, and we'll definitely have a plate of sliced veggies, and probably a side of fruit salad. I'm going to make cranberry salsa and we'll eat it with nachos for supper. And there will be chocolates and games and Clementines. And my five favourite people will be there.

I hope your Christmas is full of the traditions that send your heart straight to God.

I hope your quiet moments are rich with joy and the knowledge that you are loved by no less than God himself. 

I hope your bellies are full and your hearts overflow.  

I hope the traditions you keep comfort you and give you peace. 

And I hope you are free from the ones that don't.

God bless you, friends.

xo.

 

Chicken Bones
image taken from ganongchocolatier.shop